Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 10 – “We are trying to make love, not war.”


This was an amazing episode, right up until the ending when we got the “good news.”

The Leg
The teams learn that their next destination is Hong Kong.

And the most dramatic airport drama of the season begins.

There are two flights, China Airlines (8AM departure) and Malaysia Air (9:15AM departure). China Air opens at 5AM while Malaysia Air opens at 4AM.

Oswald & Danny go the Malaysia Air office early and are 1st on the Standby List. The BQs are 2nd and Eric & Danielle are 3rd. The BQs try to get their names bumped up past the other two, it doesn’t work. Then, Oswald & Danny make their way to China Airlines next while Charla & Mirna go straight there. Meanwhile, the BQs and Eric & Danielle go to the ticket counter. Oswald & Danny and C&M get on the list first while the BQs are trying to get their names above the other two teams.

Oswald & Danny and Charla & Mirna try to get into the China Airlines office.

Mirna: “Good luck Yield Queens!”

Oswald & Danny are the only team to make it on the first flight and they give Charla & Mirna their confirmation number for the 2nd flight since they are first on the list. The BQs will have none of that and we see a little confrontation between them and Mirna. They both get on the flight though and Eric & Danielle have to take another flight arriving later.

In Hong Kong, Oswald & Danny decide to take their 2nd Fast Forward of the Race. In this Fast Forward, they must ride in a car with a professional stunt driver and take part in a high-speed action scene. It was actually pretty exciting. They arrive at the Pit Stop first.

Meanwhile, the next flight arrives. Charla & Mirna glide along and find their next clue is a Detour.

Oswald & Danny go flying.

Everybody is Kung Fu fighting.

In the Detour, teams have to choose between Kung Fu Fighting or Lost in Translation. In Kung Fu Fighting, teams have to climb up 11 stories of bamboo scaffolding while being surrounded by Kung Fu stuntmen fighting around them. In Lost in Translation, teams have to search through tons of signs for one sign that matches the picture.

Dustin & Kandice finish the Kung Fu Fighting and head to the Road Block.

Charla & Mirna hesitate on which Detour to choose, but ultimately go with the Kung Fu, though unsure about Charla being able to climb. However, Charla makes it look easy and Mirna makes for a hilarious time as she herself fights off some Kung Fu warriors (clever editing TAR editors!).

At the Road Block, they have to kick their way through doors to find their next clue pasted on a wall. Kandice does the Road Block and they are told to make their way to Victoria Park where they have to guide a Travelocity Roaming Gnome across a model boat pond on a model junk. .

Mirna fights.

Charla loves kicking things.

Meanwhile, Charla & Mirna are driven straight to Hong Kong Island when they were supposed to take a ferry there. So they ride from Hong Kong Island to Kowloon and back, and they make their way to the old police headquarters. Charla does the Road Block, while expressing her love of kicking things.

Eric & Danielle are bringing up the rear, and it looks like they are neck and neck with Charla & Mirna, but the girls finish 3rd and E&D finish last. And the moment I was dreading, Phil gives them the “good news” of a non-elimination. Yay! [/sarcasm]

The Teams

Charla & Mirna

Kind of like focus episodes on Lost or Power Rangers (!), this totally felt like a focus episode on Charla & Mirna, and it was fun. I have to take note though, when Mirna talks to her “friends” at the ticket office or at the counters, she always seems to be just kidding around and I think some people take her too seriously (I’m looking at you BQs!). Charla absolutely rocked this episode. She climbed up an 11 story building! And then she does the kickin’ Road Block. Add to that their little moments together wishing in the Harbor and wheeling around in the airport (Heelies!). Charla & Mirna for the win.

Oswald & Danny had a legendary leg their first time in Hong Kong. Not so much this time, but it was interesting to see that they (and looks like E&D) were running out of money, giving their last 20 (HK?) dollars to the toll. Anyway, they have been doing an outstanding job all season long and they can easily win the whole thing.

Oswald & Danny

Dustin and Kandice

Dustin & Kandice, I saw some things from them that annoyed the hell out of me in TAR10. A little cocky at the airport with an air of smug-ness throughout the leg, but they’re still okay in my book. (No messing with Mirna though!) Still, they very much deserve to be in the final four, as well as the final three. Two straight seasons of TAR and they are still going strong.

Eric & Danielle, grr… I was definitely expecting a non-elim, so I was dreading the ending as they were in last place the entire leg. What luck these two have. Even though I don’t like them and I still think they shouldn’t even have been considered for TARAS, I still believe that Eric can run a better Race by himself, and Danielle, even with a few tantrums in airports this season, isn’t as bad a whiner as some in the past. But I still hope they are eliminated next.

Eric and Danielle

A Plea to TAR Producers
Please, please, please… bring back the old, REAL Fast Forward! I’m just sad that the FF has become nothing but an advertisement for a new car (TAR7) or Travelocity. Before TAR5 and the introduction of the Yield, the FF brought about extra drama, gave underdogs a chance to catch up, and actually took some strategy to use. Now instead of deciding when it was “most advantageous to go for it,” if you’re first, you take it. I shuddered last season when it looked like it was going to be relegated to being an after-thought of a non-elimination penalty. I understand the logistics problems or that TAR wants to save money, but they could easily find something easy and cheap to produce in each destination. As long as its not eating 3 feet of sausage or getting your head shaved.

Remember, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!

Mirna: “We’re gonna bring on the muscles.”
Mirna: *points to her head* This muscle here is the one we try to use the most.”

Mirna: “Shh… Close that door. Close that door!”
Desmond: “Its okay, keep it open.”
Mirna: “No! Its too cold! Way too cold.”

Mirna: “Look, take your padded bra and the stuff you’ve got stuffed in there and take it elsewhere.”

Danielle: “What do you want to do?”
Eric: “Go stand in a puddle, drop your hairdryer in it and kill ourselves.”

Mirna: “Good luck Yield Queens! Good luck!”

Mirna: “Can you tell these Kung Fu warriors to go away a little. I hope they don’t fall on my head.”

Mirna: “We are trying to make love, not war.”

Mirna: “Oh, they’re making it shakey. Okay, okay. No more, I’m coming to fight you. Good job Charla, this is fun, is all heck. Hong Kong! I love you!”

And a little note from me.
And so, I’m off to the Philippines tonight (while pretending I’m trying to get myself on the earliest possible flight and then having to hurry to make a connection in Manila… maybe wheel around on heelies in the airport and find a ticket offices to camp out at).

I just hope I’ll be able to get AXN or Studio 23 in the Philippine provinces so I can see TAR <IMG height=15 alt=”
So with limited (read:no) internet access where I’ll be staying most of the next two weeks, enjoy the next two episodes (I’m sure they’ll be awesome) and see you all right before the finale!


Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 9 – “These are the future Charlas and Mirnas of the world!”


Well, even though we pretty much knew who was going to be eliminated from the start, it was still a fun episode.

The Leg
So we have the teams learn they will have to make their way to Kuala Lampur, Malaysia.

Uchenna & Joyce take a chance with a very tight connection through Frankfurt. They don’t make it. Meanwhile, Charla & Mirna are able to find the earliest flight and arrive in Kuala Lampur 3 hours before the others.  They chase a bus that will take them to the Batu Caves.

At the Caves, the teams climb up a whole lot of steps to get their clue which tells them to go to Kampung Baru Mosque. It takes a while for Charla to get up there, but they maintain their first place lead.

Charla & Mirna chase after a bus.

The BQs Yield Eric & Danielle.

Charla & Mirna pass on the Yield and find their Detour. In Artistic Expression, teams have to use a technique known as batik to duplicate a print onto a long piece of cloth and then dye it. In Cookie Confection, teams have to bite through 600 boxes of cookies until they find one with a licorice center.

Charla & Mirna (maybe thinking about the biting through chocolates Road Block from TAR5) choose the cookies.

The BQs arrive next and decide to Yield Eric & Danielle. They then go straight to the batik Detour, while Charla & Mirna give up on the cookies and switch over.

Meanwhile, Oswald & Danny get lost AND THEN disagree over which Detour to do. Oswald & Danny then arrive at the cookies, seeing the mess C&M made and start the Detour, while disagreeing on what exactly they need to do.

The BQs finish first and go to the Road Block, Part-Time Job. Here, they have to use a bike and go around the neighborhood trying to collect old newspapers for recycling. “Surat Khabar Lama” is the phrase they can use to ask for papers. Kandice has an easy time, yeah.

Oswald & Danny disagree

Lots of fern friends in Malaysia.

Back at the Detour, Charla & Mirna pull ahead of Oswald & Danny, while Eric & Danielle finish their Yield and head to the cookies.

As Charla & Mirna arrive at the Road Block, the BQs finish, make their way to the Pit Stop and score another first place finish, yeah.

Pretty soon, all three teams arrive at the Road Block. Mirna gets LOTS of help from some local Malaysians (who, I’ve learned, are big TAR fans) whom she calls the next Charla & Mirna (TARAsia look out!). They finish 2nd.

Both Danielle and Danny are short 4 hand widths of papers.  Danielle complains about doing all the hard Road Blocks (and how Eric is a woman) as she has to go back while Danny has to pay money to get papers at a gas station.

Eric & Danielle finish 3rd despite being Yielded and Oswald & Danny, who are still a little bit frustrated are 4th.

Night falls as Uchenna & Joyce, who are probably a day behind, finally arrive in Kuala Lampur and are told to go directly to the Pit Stop where they are eliminated.

Eric doesn’t look happy.

The Teams
Well, we have our Final Four teams!! Wow, time definitely has flown!

Charla & Mirna have really run an amazing Race so far. They have had the perfect mix of luck and skill/strength to do very well. Add lots of personality and you’ve got a real All-Star team.

Dustin & Kandice are also doing very well. Not as smug and cocky as they were in TAR10, the BQs are making good decisions and are very strong. They could actually go all the way.

Oswald & Danny were a mess this leg. Some bad luck plus their confusing decisions and bickering really put them far back in this leg. The usually happy-go-lucky ChaChas were hit with a little bout of frustration this leg. Let’s hope they get over it fast.

Uchenna & Joyce were drama-less, which is definitely not a bad thing. They didn’t Race particularly well, but they were a decent team. They fell because of bad flights, which seems to be a recurring theme this season. But at least they’ve already experienced going to the end, and their marriage seems stronger than ever.  Best wishes to them! And hopefully, they’ll get to be parents very soon! 

And finally, Eric & Danielle. I honestly have never heard “Dirty Pirate Hooker” before in my life, but while it got a chuckle from me, they are still not All-Stars in my opinion. If only Danielle had to repeat that TAR9 Yield experience all over again, it would’ve been awesome.

Remember, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!

Charla: “They definitely don’t need a stairmaster in their country.”

Mirna: “I love licorice! You know how much I love my cookies. Cookies with licorice! Can’t get better than this!”

Charla: “That’s a lot of damn cookies.”

Charla: “Oswald & Danny just came Mirna!”
Mirna: “Yeah, I see. I’m not blind!”

Danny: “Who’dve told me I was going to be a sweatshop in Malaysia.

Malaysian Man (to Kandice): “You should have no problem getting free newspaper. The way you look, yeah.”

Mirna: “You don’t need this many newspapers, it clutters your house and then you become a clutterbug.”

Mirna: “I recruited team Charla/Mirna… youngsters. These are the future Charlas and Mirnas of the world! The juniors!”
Mirna (to Young Malaysian Man): “Stay out of drugs. Go to school. Be a professional. And you’re in good shape.”

Danielle: “Every Road Block that is designed for a guy, I am doing. And every Road Block for a girl, Eric does. He’s a woman.”



Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episodes 7 and 8 – “They’re going to think we’re crazy on the streets.”


It was an absolutely thrilling, fun, action-packed two hours of The Amazing Race. One of the best episodes ever I think.

The Leg
There is a 16 hour difference between the first and last place team. The lead teams learn that they need to fly to Warsaw, Poland.

Dustin & Kandice, Charla & Mirna, Oswald & Danny tell the travel agent to hang up on Uchenna & Joyce.

The BQs get on the first flights that arrive almost two hours before the provided tickets. Uchenna & Joyce seem to have obtained tickets that get them there at the same time, 9:10AM.

Meanwhile, Charla & Mirna and Oswald & Danny stay seven hours at the travel agent before getting a flight that arrives at 9:45AM.

Joe & Bill and Eric & Danielle are not let on their connecting flight in Kilimanjaro. Joe goes to the side of the tarmac and starts ringing his bell to stop the plane. It doesn’t work and they have to take a morning flight.

Uchenna & Joyce are not let on the early flight and the BQs arrive first in Warsaw where they make their way to “Chopin” playing

The BQs arrive at the Detour.
In Perfect Pitch… they must find and fix the out of tune key in a grand piano. The pianist then plays Chopin to make sure the key is in tune. In Perfect Angle.. they must carry a mannequin to the Panoramik Laboratory and position it under an x-ray machine at the right angle to obtain their next clue.

The BQs have an easy time at the Perfect Pitch Detour with Dustin’s piano playing experience and glide their way to the Pit Stop (Missing Road Block!) at park where the monument to Jan III Sobieski Lazienki is located.

Oswald & Danny struggle at the Detour and break a couple of piano strings, but finish. Charla & Mirna struggle themselves, but then switch Detours and do Perfect Angle. The Polish people basically ignore them until they meet one woman who leads them to Panoramik.

Meanwhile, Joyce’s own piano playing experience help them quickly finish and they place 3rd. Charla & Mirna finish 4th.

The Guidos and Eric & Danielle are more than 12 hours behind the first place BQs who now start the next leg of the Race in the middle of the night.

This is the first time since season 1! that teams have started a leg while other teams have yet to complete the previous leg.

They learn that their next clue is at Auschwitz, but they will take a charter bus… which will leave at 1PM the next day. And here’s TAR’s way of allowing the Guidos and Eric & Danielle to catch up.

It’s a non-elimination leg and all the teams are now either on the 1PM charter bus or the 5PM bus. The BQs, Oswald & Danny and Uchenna & Joyce are on the 1st bus and arrive at Auschwitz where they pay an emotional tribute to those whose lives were taken away there, in a solemn moment reminiscent of TAR6’s tribute to the slaves in Senegal.

Auschwitz was actually a lot more emotional, especially being at night. (It definitely had me tearing up.)

After the emotional moment, the teams make their way to Krakow where they find an Intersection . Oswald & Danny and Uchenna & Joyce are first, they team up and complete the Fast Forward where they must count the steps on the stairs of the towers of St. Mary’s church and the Town Hall in the city. They finish and tie first and Oswald & Danny defer the prize to Uchenna & Joyce.

Meanwhile, Dustin & Kandice have to wait a few hours for the next bus for a team to team up with. Charla & Mirna arrive first, they hesitate to team up with them, but they decide its better to just go.

Eric & Danielle and Joe & Bill arrive last and team up.

The teams head to the Detour. In Eat It Up… teams must make a 3-inch kielbasa sausage and then each team member must eat a 2 foot long sausage. In Roll it Out, teams have to roll out 20 bagels and then deliver them to a restaurant.

The BQs and Charla & Mirna go to Eat It Up They make the 3 inch sausages, pray together and dig into their 8 feet of sausage. The Guidos and Eric & Danielle get lost on their way to Roll It Out so they go to Eat It Up and the four teams are neck and neck. Bill finishes his sausage before the girls, upping the determined girls to finish there’s.

Dustin throws up after she finishes her sausage (Eric: “Ladies and gentlemen, Miss California!”)

Of the girls, Charla is the only one left. She decides its time for her to throw up the sausage so far. In one of the funniest moments ever on all of reality television, Charla decides to stick a knife in her mouth to make herself throw up, and she admittedly has no idea what she’s doing. (Charla: “I don’t know how people do this.”) Everyone cracking up, Bill and Danielle covering their ears… it was just madness and hilarity.

Eric & Danielle and The Guidos finish first, but the BQs and Charla & Mirna realize that they must drive themselves.

Charla & Mirna fall behind and has a frantic encounter with two taxi drivers. However, they still manage to beat Eric & Danielle and the Guidos to the Road Block.

The BQs finish it first where one team member has to dress in armor and then lead a horse through the forest to the Pieskowa Skała castle gates. They are 3rd.

Charla has trouble leading the horse as they turn in several circles on the road, but ultimately the finish 4th.

The Guidos finish 5th, but their 30 minute penalty kicks in and they are eliminated.

The Teams
Charla & Mirna are just continuing to be a whole mixed bag of emotions. I can see how they can annoy everyone, but there’s also much to love and enjoy about them. They are pushing forward.

Dustin & Kandice did well these two legs. Even though I thought there were all right in TAR10, I enjoy them now. They are Racing well and are not as cocky as they were in TAR10.

Uchenna & Joyce are rolling along as well.

Oswald & Danny continue to have fun and still do well on the Race. It was fun seeing them at the piano/concert hall place.

Eric & Danielle seem to be the closest dating team ever! [/sarcasm] Danielle didn’t seem as useless this week, she actually did well, especially at the eating Detour. I still think Eric could do better on his own.

And the Guidos, Joe & Bill. It must suck to be done in, once again, because they could not overcome their immense distance from the lead teams. It also sucks that they had to be part of two of the few times in TAR history that teams have been more than 12 hours behind the rest. Still, while not as ruthless and cunning this time around, they still Raced well enough to get this far and were very enjoyable to watch.

Honestly, The Amazing Race: All-Stars has not had one single bad episode/leg yet. Even last week’s episode was better than most. TARAS might really be the best TAR season ever!

Remember, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!



Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episodes 7 and 8 – Just the Quotes!


Just the Quotes


Danielle: “So Warsaw is not here obviously.”
Eric: “No, Warsaw is in Poland knucklehead.”
Danielle: “Poland!?!?!”

Dustin: “We’re going to see Chopin play the piano!”
Kandice: “Really?”
Dustin: “Well, he’s dead.”

Danielle: “I’m surprised Jeremy didn’t kill you.”

Charla: “You like Polish Hot Dogs?”
Mirna: “You like Polish Sausage?”
Charla: “Sausage?”
Mirna: “Good?”
Charla: “He doesn’t like us too much.”
Mirna: “No, I don’t think so.”

Nobody in Poland wants to speak to Charla & Mirna.
Mirna: “Maybe they’ve never seen a little person. Nobody wants to talk to us, it’s like we’re the plague or something.”

The piano is out of tune.
Charla: “Sounds like an ambulance is coming.”

Oswald: “The piano player wasn’t bad to look at.”
Danny: “Yeah, he was eye candy.”

Charla: “I don’t know why it’s all men. They don’t have any women mannequin?”

Carrying the mannequin.
Charla: “They’re going to think we’re crazy on the streets.”

Polish Lady: “Oh gosh! He has a broken leg.”
Charla: “That’s okay, he’ll get fixed at the hospital.”

Mirna: “Oh great, we’ve got to do x-rays. Is that good for you? Charla, you’ve got to get out of the room. What are you doing? You’re hiding the x-ray image.”
Charla: “You’re supposed to cover the private part.”
Mirna: “Great.”

Choosing a mannequin:
Joe: “Pick the hunkiest one!”

Joe: “Try his pecs, he’s got pecs kind of like yours now!”

Charla: “This is a real fun task, let me tell you. After the naked mannequin and now the sausage?”

Mirna: “Female bonding over sausages.”

Joe: “The one thing we know is that Mirna can’t drive worth a damn.”

Mirna: “We don’t have a hundred dollars to give anybody! You think I’m made of money? I’m a young girl, I don’t have hundred dollars. You think I’m a millionaire?”

Mirna: “Haves a little bit of sympathy! As a human being! We are here at 2 in the morning. You can show me, my friend! Just show me! Please my friend, I am begging you!”

Dustin: “I thought my heels at home were pointy.”

Joe: “She looks like a dressed up rat.”

Mirna: “Horsey! I have sausage!”



Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 6 – “You have each won a twelve and a half foot catamaran!”


As if it wasn’t a crazy episode to begin with, it ended with one of the best teams ever being Philiminated.

The Leg
Okay, this leg was probably the craziest leg ever. It must have been logistics hell for the production team. Its kind of hard to go chronologically with teams being all over the place, so…

Night One: The teams get ready to make their way to Dar es Salaam, Tanzania.
But before that, they have to all overcome some of the toughest airport drama I’ve ever seen on the Race.

Day One:
Charla & Mirna take a risk by flying first to Johannesburg and then to Tanzania. It pays off and they arrive in Dar Es Salaam hours and hours before the other teams. They get to the dhows at the pier, but the man says that bad weather and an impending storm prevents them from leaving and they’ll have to wait for the next morning. Pan up to the blue, partly cloudy sky.
Hmm… (more on this later).

Meanwhile, the teams learn they all have to go to Jo’burg (as they say) to take a connect flight to Dar es Salaam.

Night Two:
Only Oswald & Danny, Dustin & Kandice, and Uchenna & Joyce make the next flight while Eric & Danielle are pulled off the plane for overbooking.

Day Two:
Eric & Danielle are then put on the next flight, with Teri & Ian and the Guidos being left behind. The last two teams take a flight that leaves in the middle of the day.

Meanwhile, the other teams make their way to Zanzibar where they encounter the Detour and Road Block.

First, Charla & Mirna and Oswald & Danny complete the Solve It Detour where they have to put together a puzzle that recreates an image by the local art known as Tinga Tinga. Oswald & Danny finish first, but stop for some fruits, which paves Charla & Mirna’s way to arrive first at the Road Block.

At the Road Block, they must use a traditional weapon of the Maasai tribe, known as a Rungu, to break a clay target in which their clue is being kept. (And Phil is starting to make his task descriptions more fun, the trademarked Phil eyebrow showed up when one of the Maasai handed him a Rungu… hilarious)

Mirna finishes it and she and Charla take off to the Pit Stop where they finish first, again. And they learn that they have won a catamaran… I absolutely loved how the music just stops when they seemed confused as to what a catamaran was… Best Pit Stop Prize Reaction Ever!

Oswald & Danny finish 2nd.

Uchenna & Joyce and Dustin & Kandice then arrive in Zanzibar. U&J do the Solve It Detour while Dustin & Kandice decide to do the physically tougher Schlep It Detour where they must haul two huge logs one mile to a dhow-making shipyard. They fall behind.

It is now Night Three! Uchenna finishes the Road Block, he and Joyce make it to the Pit Stop as Team 3 and the 30 minute penalty doesn’t affect anything.

The BQs must have spent a looong time with the Detour because they arrive more than 30 minutes after U&J at the Pit Stop. They are 4th.

Looong after them, Eric & Danielle finish the Detour and arrive at the Road Block where Danielle doesn’t even complete the Road Block … her clay pot just falls off without her Rungu even touching the stick the pot was hanging on. They are 5th.

The Guidos and Teri & Ian finally arrive in Zanzibar where they complete the Solve It Detour. The Guidos finish first and stay ahead of Teri & Ian all the way to the Pit Stop.

It is now Day Three of the Leg!! Teri & Ian are eliminated.

The “Conspiracy” or aka TAR Producers Didn’t Think There Would be Such a Huge Gap Between Teams
Its pretty much understood that the producers randomly throw in “Hours of Operation” or book flights for the teams during legs when it appears that teams will be spread out as much as 24 hours apart. I’m sure TAR would not want a repeat of the Guidos falling more than 24 hours behind in TAR1 and David & Jeff repeating that fate in TAR4.

It’s a logistic problem and honestly, it’ll make the leg boring and predictable. That’s what happened this leg. It looks like the producers didn’t expect the teams to be sooo spread out, otherwise they would’ve booked flights for the teams to have them all together. When Hours of Operation would seem pointless as Charla & Mirna would’ve been at least 12 hours ahead, they instead had the dhow “driver” I guess say that a storm was coming so they had to wait until the next morning.

Charla & Mirna seemed just as confused as us viewers… the sky was blue, the clouds were white… That’s all… lol, it was just so obvious, it was funny.

The Teams
Well, Charla & Mirna have taken over the Race! So only three teams have placed first in six legs. Romber took the first three, Oswald & Danny took over in leg 4, and now Charla & Mirna have taken legs 5 and 6. They’re stepping up their game, and over the last two legs, it hasn’t been mostly luck. In fact, they’ve placed first mostly on their own decisions. And they’re still hilarious.

Oswald & Danny are still silently doing well. Silent as in no drama, but not silent in terms of joking around and being funny.

Uchenna & Joyce are doing all right. They’re lucky that this leg wasn’t as close as all the others.

Dustin & Kandice are showing some signs of tiring out after two consecutive Races.

Eric & Danielle are still a waste of an All-Star slot and my least favorite to win. If they win, they’ll be just as horrible as the winners of the other two All-Star CBS editions.

The Guidos are far, far behind and will have a lot of catch-up to do in the next leg.

Teri & Ian… it as a MaGMCM at the end when I was practically bawling when they gave their subdued “We’re comin’ Phil!” I loved Teri & Ian all through TAR3 and I loved them even more now on All-Stars. They truly are All-Stars and will still be one of the most competitive Racers ever. A perfect mix of character and strength, not letting their age hold them back… Teri & Ian… you guys are the best.

Remember, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!

Danielle: “Hope we get a good flight to Tanzania.”
Eric: “Where the Tanzanian Devil lives.”
Danielle: “Its not Tanzania, its Tasmania Devil.”
Eric: “Oh is it Tasmanian ?”
Danielle: “Oh, Tas…manian Devil.”

Eric: “Okay, I was just kidding.”

Mirna (in a Spanish accent): “What number you have to dial out? Nine?”

Charla (in a Spanish accent): “Just try… please. I’m asking. Why not possible? Just dial. Hit… hit… hit.”

Ian: “Let’s try to start racing smart. Stop, look and listen.”
Teri: “Yeah, but do we have to stop in an airport.”

Mirna: “Throw me the water bottle!”
Charla throws the bottle.
Charla: “Good throw, maybe you should’ve done it.”

Oswald: “Mirna got one. She must have been praying to her grandmother, her grandfather, her eternal lineage.”

Phil: “As the winners of this leg of the Race, you have each won a twelve and a half foot catamaran.”
Charla & Mirna: “Huh? What is that?”
Phil: “It’s a jewel hulled sailing boat.”
Charla & Mirna: “Yay!”



Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 5 – “That’s a huge damn rat.”


“How will Rob & Amber’s elimination affect the other teams?” Uh… not at all? There’s really no effect at all really, other than how any other team eliminated affects the Race. Its one less team to Race against, that’s all. Geez, even after they’re eliminated they try to sneak them onto the Race.

The Leg
Anyway, the teams make their way half a mile to the Glacier where they need to use a navigator to find an avalanche beacon.

The BQs pass the gear they need and they have to go back to the chair lifts to get the pack, but they still manage to pass Oswald & Danny who are the last team at the clue.

They all end up on the same early flight to Maputo, Mozambique.

The Road Block at Mapopo training field, “Who smells a rat?” has the teams use a trained rat to find a deactivated landmine. The rat finds the mine, and they dig up a flag, Charla & Mirna are the last team.

(Some of the rats’ names… Nelson, Xena, and Tupac.)

In the Detour, Pamper or Porter… teams either have to get 30 meticais by getting people to let them paint their nails or fill ten sacks with charcoal, sew them closed, then take one sack to a specified address.

Aparently, nail painting is more commonly done by men in Mozambique, something the teams didn’t know.

Mirna & Charla and the BQs go do Pamper and easily finish in 1st and 2nd respectively at the Fortalezza Pit Stop.

All the other teams think the charcoal is faster, and struggle with the labor-intensive task.

Teri & Ian, who arrive at the clue last, are mistakenly taken to the location of the Pamper detour and reluctantly decide they might as well do it. Charla & Mirna and the BQs seem to have asked a couple of people to paint their nails. Teri & Ian ask two girls to get their nails painted for the whole 30 metical. (Mozambican girl: “Its too much!”)
Instead, the one girl pays 20 and the other pays 10. Teri & Ian quickly paint their nails, the girls are fine with it. They finish 3rd.

One of the funniest moments ever on The Amazing Race, and even funnier than dancing Phil, was Oswald & Danny, covered in charcoal, chasing Phil around wanting to hug him. They are fourth.

After a seemingly growing feud between the Guidos and Eric & Danielle, they finish 5th and 6th respectively seconds apart.

Uchenna & Joyce, who get lost finishing the Road Block, finish last in this first non-elimination leg. They are now marked for elimination.

The Teams
Teri & Ian… Thank goodness the driver took them to the other Detour and thank goodness for those two girls. I’m sure they would’ve been last if they did the charcoal. It was pretty funny. They could’ve just poured the nail polish all over their hands. Anyway, Go Teri & Ian!

Charla & Mirna get their first, first place finish ever. Good for them. They were great at the Detour… “We put clear, manly colors!” Ha, they should start their own business… Charla & Mirna’s Hollywood Nails.

Oswald & Danny had a little bit of frustration on the Glacier, but they easily got over it and did well. Dustin & Kandice got over their oversight and finished strong too. I thought it was sweet that they gave the little girl a free nail polish. 

Uchenna & Joyce now have to find a way to get first next leg. There may or may not be a Fast Forward so who knows what’ll happen.

And the Guidos and Eric & Danielle. I guess there is a mini-feud going on there. Eric did make some stupid, childish comments towards Joe & Bill several times during the leg. And looks like Danielle freaks out again! next week. Great…

I was a little sad when Joe & Bill said they were the “kinder and gentler” Guidos this time around. Its funny how while I hated them on TAR1, I look back now and think how hilariously evil they were.

Remember, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!

Charla: “We’ll just be a popsicle… and somebody can suck us.”

Mirna: “What the hell is an avalanche beacon?”
Charla: “An avalanche is when the snow falls down.”

Ian: “Is your underwear tagged ‘Team Guido’?”
Joe: “You don’t want to see our underwear.”
Ian: “We have paper, so…”
Joe: “We have thongs. Sometimes they give you wedgies.”

Charla: “I’ve never been to a glacier in my life.”

Oswald: “If you get caught in an avalanche…”
Danny: “Never look for Oswald & Danny to get you out”

Joe: “We smell like a French whore, but it doesn’t matter to me.”

Mirna: “That’s a huge damn rat.”

Oswald: “I’ll set you free after and I’ll take you to a nice lab where they’ll apply make-up to you.”

Joe: “When we retire, maybe we can come here and get jobs as rat trainers.”

Bill: “Two guys painting nails…”
Joe: “Yeah, that’s going to be weird.”

Mirna: “I’m glad they have metrosexuals everywhere in the world.”

Phil (to the BQs): “Pretty in Pink in Mozambique”

Danny: “Do I look like Rambo?”
Oswald: “You look like a faggy raccoon.”

Oswald: “Don’t get me dirty Danny!”

Phil (to Oswald & Danny): “I’m surprised you went for the coal… but that’s just me.”
Oswald: “We came to win… we didn’t come to sissyfoot.”



Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 4 – “Level 5! LEVEL 5!! On the treadmill!”


The Amazing Race: All-Stars is now 4-4. Amazing episodes so far and this week was no different. Plus, the ending was awesome…

The Leg
The teams make their way to the airport to fly to Punta Arenas, Chile. All the teams except for Joe & Bill and Charla & Mirna make it onto the first flight that arrives about an hour and a half earlier.

The teams arrive in Punta Arenas and make their way to Lord Lonsdale’s Shipwreck where they encounter the Detour: Navigate It or Sign It.

Teri & Ian, Eric & Danielle, and Oswald & Danny easily complete Navigate It where they use a compass to navigate themselves to the Nautilus Building. That enables them to be the only three teams on the first charter flight to Ushuaia.

I loved their playfulness at the airport with that whole dropping of the cap onto Ian and Ian wanting to go party… definitely an example of how ALL the teams on All-Stars are friendly and enjoying the Race together.

Uchenna & Joyce, Romber, and the BQs do Sign It, in which they have to create a sign post ordering the stops of Ferdinand Magellan from top to bottom, making sure to spell everything correctly and putting them in order of when Magellan visited the places.

It personally kills me to have “Philippines” have a part in ending Romber’s TARAS dominance. But come on, “Phillipeans?” What kind of spelling is that? An extra L or a missing P is the usual, most common error, but to spell it so horribly wrong is just hilarious and perfectly fitting for Romber.

Uchenna & Joyce figure out their mistake in lining up the destinations on the post, and are stuck on the 2nd charter flight to the end of the world.

Romber and the BQs switch Detours and do Navigate It together, with Rob getting them lost before finishing the task. But not before the Guidos passing them at the starting point for their little task.

Charla & Mirna, in their now signature dramatic fashion, attempt the Sign It Detour and we are treated to a frantic exchange between them as they carry the sign making supplies up a hill. Charla first tries to lug a crate of supplies, then tries to carry a wooden post, I guess 4x her size. They decide to switch Detours as well.

The teams arrive in Ushuaia and take a taxi to Playa Larga for their next clue that tells them they must take a boat to the post office at Isla Redonda near the southernmost tip of South America.

After the 2nd charter flight arrives, we see the first set-up for the epic showdown we’d see at the end of the episode. Romber and Charla & Mirna are the last two teams at the airport waiting for a taxi and the cousins have one called for them while Romber goes to the airport entrance to catch the first taxi that arrives. One comes along, and Charla & Mirna come running to claim it, but Rob & Amber take it.

Then at Playa Larga, Charla & Mirna make the mistake of following a just as clueless Romber who then try to trick the cousins into thinking they had the clue.

At the Isla Redonda post office, the Road Block required one team member to sort through a bag of mail to find one addressed to them. Inside was a letter from another team they had raced with in their respective first seasons.

Blake & Paige write the letter to 1st Place team Oswald & Danny. Jeremy & Dani tell Eric & Danielle not to have babies on the Race, and they arrive 2nd. “Nice people” (as Ian calls them) Flo & Zach show their admiration for the once “old retired people” as Teri & Ian HOORAH their way into 3rd.

Frank (of Frank & Margarita) wrote a little rhyme/rap for the Guidos with the hopes that he’s annoyed them as much as they annoyed him in TAR1. On the contrary, they loved it and took 4th.

In 5th place, BQs get a letter from the one half of “Bama” that actually enjoyed most of the Race, Lyn. Susan & Patrick, apparently good friends of Uchenna & Joyce, wrote their letter.

And now two teams are left. Charla & Mirna catch up to Rob & Amber at the post office and the showdown has begun. Rob tries to “get under people’s skin” again, but Mirna fires back with a “Shut the hell up” and an expletive that, in my opinion, definitely fit in the situation.

Mirna finds their letter first and she and Charla read some not-so-kind words from the first TAR quitters Marshall & Lance who basically insult them, I’m not sure in a jokingly-way. However, we are treated to a an all-time classic TAR moment with Marshall & Lance’s “drive-by” “Bitch!” comment.

Anyway, we get a tense footrace to the mat, but we see Uchenna helping Charla up to the mat, showing that it wasn’t even close. Charla & Mirna take 7th place and the smug, high and mighty Rob & Amber have finally fallen, succumbing to an entire season and four legs of karma.

The Teams
With Rob & Amber finally gone, this is now the first time ever in TAR history that I am actually rooting for every single team left in the Race, to varying degrees of course.

Rob & Amber, strong racers… whatever. They are much more deserving teams of their spot, they’ve been on 25 other reality shows, they have their own show now, Rob’s been hunting aliens and ghosts, they didn’t need to be on TARAS. So good riddance to them, and hopefully I won’t have to watch any other show with them on it ever.

Eric & Danielle… Danielle is still “blah” to me. She hasn’t really done anything on either TAR9 or now to justify her being on the Race. Basically, Eric is carrying their team along. I disagree with people calling Flo or TAR9’s Monica useless, but Danielle… yeah she’s probably useless, other than fulfilling the requirement that there be two people on a team.

Uchenna & Joyce are fine. They’re good people, and great to watch. Dustin & Kandice were great this episode too.

The Guidos have to step up their game. They are falling behind. Oswald & Danny are hilarious as always. I was surprised they actually aired the kiss between both of these teams. I had no problem with it, but wasn’t there all that drama with the Survivor gay couples? Kudos to TAR… simply the best J

Charla & Mirna are just crazy and hilarious. I don’t hate them at all. They are all kinds of awesome. They’re not hurting anyone… Mirna’s different reasonings and rationale are hilarious, but harmless.

And finally, Teri & Ian… the most awesomest, amazing team on All-Stars and maybe even ever. HOORAH! They just have to iron out the wrinkles though.

Overall, TARAS is running on all cylinders. I don’t know how any loyal TAR fan can say that this has not been amazing so far. If it continues like this, it will be one of the best, if not the best TAR seasons ever.

As of last night, TAR has guaranteed itself its 4th consecutive Emmy.

Remember, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!


Eric: “I’m treating her pretty much like a guy, except she has nicer boobs.”

Danny: “I only snore when I drink excessively.”

Oswald: “If I were to stab you, I’d stab you right in the front.”

Danielle: “We’re going on a charter plane to go to Australia.”
Eric: “No, not Australia, Argentina! How can you charter to Australia? We’d have to stop for gas 8,000 times.”

Ian: “Guys? Do we have a full day layover here? Where we going partying?”

Oswald: “Maui, Maui!”
Danny: “Will you come with us?”
Phil: “That’s a whole ‘nother reality show.”

Flo & Zach: “I didn’t expect a retired couple could make it so far.”

Mirna: “Charla! Level 5! LEVEL 5!! On the treadmill! You can do it!”

Mirna: “See ya! Wouldn’t wanna be ya!”


Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 3 – “I’m sorry I’m wearing a bathing suit. It is very weird, I know.”


I thought this week was pretty exciting… not as awesome as last week’s best episode ever candidate, but still amazing. I do love that the legs have been so close.

The Leg
The teams make their way to the San Pedro de Atacama church in the middle of the night for their first clue.

We get a glimpse of classic Guido when Bill stands in front of Eric & Danielle’s SUV after Eric & Danielle take advantage of Bill asking for directions. Definitely reminiscent of the infamous Nancy-shoving airport incident, but the only difference is Eric & Danielle deserve the wrath of the Guidos.

Speaking of airport incidents, we had a few big moments. First, Uchenna & Joyce try to buy tickets for three other teams, but they only get to buy some for the Guidos. And with four teams on a earlier plane, the rest of the teams need some catch up.

Teri & Ian and Charla & Mirna hope to make standby tickets and both teams rush to the gate where we see Mirna try to nudge her way in while Teri & Ian are speaking to the agent. Teri & Ian won’t have it and we have a fun back and forth between the two.

In Puerto Montt, we have teams getting lost left and right. The teams head to the Road Block where they must catch and transport 80 live fish from one tank into another, which will reveal their next clue at the bottom of the tank.

Danielle freaks out at first, but learns how to use her boobs to complete the task. David and Mirna aren’t having much fun either.

After the Road Block, teams head to La Maquina where they will find their Detour, Vertical Limit or River Wild. None of the teams choose the 40 foot rock climb where they each have to obtain half of the clue. All the teams do the River Wild with white water rafting in strong, strong rapids.

Joe doesn’t write down the whole clue and he and Bill were lucky to find Charla & Mirna, otherwise, they would’ve wandered around a longer time. Meanwhile, Dustin & Kandice don’t find the Detour clue, and go straight to the River Wild Detour, oblivious to their mistake. David & Mary, however, take a wrong turn and later have to backtrack.

The white water rafting scenes were freakin’ exciting.

Rob & Amber, for some reason, get lucky once again and get first. Dustin & Kandice going back to find their missed clue didn’t hurt them in their placing one bit. And David & Mary’s mistake turned out to be costly, making them the third All-Star team eliminated.

The Teams
Rob & Amber… they definitely benefited from the mistakes of some other teams. They’re not bending the rules this time around (yet), but they’re high and mighty attitudes are still a big problem and a huge turn-off. I can only hope they suffer the biggest TAR fall from grace ever. 1st to 8th and Eliminated. I’d love that.

Teri & Ian… Come on guys!! Hump it! They need to step it up, they made some little mistakes, but those little mistakes might cost them in the future. Still… HOORAH!

Dustin & Kandice… they’re lucky their little oversight didn’t hurt them. Uchenna & Joyce seemed to have moved up a little. Oswald & Danny are very consistent.

The Guidos are even luckier than the BQs. They could have easily been eliminated this week had they not run into Charla & Mirna. We saw a little bit of classic Guido-lite this week.

Not so much overdramatics from Charla & Mirna this week, which is a shame. I thought their kidnapping of the guy was pretty funny.

Eric & Danielle… eh… Danielle is still not All-Star material.

And finally David & Mary… I still love ‘em. Them still good ‘ol people. I loved Mary being very energetic and determined at the Detour. God bless ‘em, they are still the realest people ever on TAR, and very luck to have Raced two times in a row. More power to them!

Overall, this episode was pretty awesome, very, very exciting. I loved the aerial shots of the teams driving around in the forest. Again, awesome cinematography and camerawork… as always. Editing was perfect, especially the pre-commercial break cliffhangers.

Just another amazing episode… All-Stars is shaping up to be one of the best TARs yet!

Remember, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!


Oswald: “Danny and I, we are two Cubans who came to this country with nothing. Sweetheart, if you get in my way, I will run you over. However, we are not going to do out of maliciousness…”

Joe: “We do feel like the godfathers of tough competitors. We can be smart, we can be fast, we can be ruthless, there is no reason to minimize us just because we are two gay men living together.”

Eric: “Peace out cub scout.”

Teri: “Dustin and Kandice are strong racers.”
Ian: “They’re funny, they wiggle and jiggle around the world… that’s totally cool with me.”

Ian: “Do not intercede here!”

Ian: “You’re being rude!”
Mirna: “I took lessons from the king of rude… you!”

Bill: “Rob is not Jesus!”

Bill: “Better take them down into submission.”
Joe: “I’m the fish whisperer!”

Eric: “Just pick them up and put your boobs on it. Use your boobs! You got to use your boobs! Use your boobs!”

Oswald: “Be the fish! Become the fish!”

Mary: “David don’t never touch fish, he’s afraid of fish.”
David: “I’m from Kentucky, I’m not a water person period. Lakes, rivers, fishing, kayaking… I don’t never do none of it. This is something I’ve never liked… is fish.”

Oswald: “Promise me you’ll do more cardio.”

Mirna: “Welcome to Charla and Mirna’s world… it’s a scary one!”

Teri: “It was exciting to fall out of the boat.”

Oswald: “Charla’s going to be in love.”

Mary: “I can’t do a 40-foot rock climb!! Ug… God!”
Mary: “I’m not a thrills and chills kind of lady.”

Mary: “Hoo, I can’t swim and I was listening to that captain. If you don’t paddle, you fall in… and to me that’s die.”

Mary: “Charla’s shoes were in my tent. I’d love to meet ‘em and beat ‘em”

Mirna: “I’m sorry I’m wearing a bathing suit. It is very weird, I know.”


Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 2 – “It’s easy to make yourself beautiful with plastic surgery.”


This had to be one of the best episodes ever… at the very least, one of the most exciting.

The Leg
Even before the teams reached the airport, they had to traverse their way through the mud path. David & Mary had to tow Charla & Mirna out of the mud, and Kevin had to tow their car himself. Drew driving on while Kevin was still hooked up to the car was pretty funny.

It was very nice to see Rob & Amber on a delayed flight, sucks that Oswald & Danny were with them.

David & Mary seem to be at the center of lots of drama this season. This time it was Drew taking David & Mary’s bags out of the overhead in first class. David didn’t take that very well.

As the teams arrived in Santiago, Chile, they made their way to the Codelco office building where they took part in the first Road Block of the season.

In this Road Block, the team member had to find letters on and around a table of businessmen and then unscramble the letters to reveal their next destination. What they didn’t know was that the location was on one of the pictures on the wall. 

I really liked this Road Block.  It reminded me of the mishandled “Treasure Hunters” on NBC and how great some of their thinking tasks were.  TAR needs a lot more of those.

Teams arrive within minutes of each other. Uchenna and Eric who started first fall behind as other teams are able to find different ways of figuring out the clue… Chuquicamata.
Kandice looks at the picture with a Q, Bill actually put letters together, Mary wrote down all the names first and then saw that the men had “Q” written all over their papers. Drew meawhile overhears Mary tell the security guard.

The lead changes that happen throughout this episode start now. One thing I noticed was how the teams were freely giving information away to each other, no bitching around. I kind of liked that!

The teams Race through the Road Block and at the airport, Amber calls Rob on his stupid “stirring the pot.”

At Calama, Chile, the teams head to the Detour. I don’t think I’ve ever seen more exciting taxicab racing not in a TAR finale.

Phil, looking tiny standing next to the huge, huge trucks/machines. In By Hand, teams must tighten all the nuts and bolts on a huge tire. In By Machine, teams must use a “frontload” to pile dirt, with each team member taking a turn at the wheel.

Joe & Bill misunderstand the clue, and have to do a little extra work when Bill disagrees with Joe’s correct original understanding.

Charla and Mirna’s “step stool” exchange is about to enter my favorite TAR exchanges of all time.

Teams struggle through both detours. It is always amazing, and a rare sight, to see ALL of the teams at one place, performing a Road Block/Detour all at the same time. I think that definitely contributed a lot to the excitement.

On the way to the Pit Stop at the Valley of the Dead, the BQs and Charla & Mirna get into a confrontation when the BQs seem to not want to pay to follow the taxi and Charla & Mirna aren’t going to allow the driver to give the BQs directions. Later Charla & Mirna get dramatic and when the last few teams pass them, they’re on their way.

In the Valley of the Moon, teams must drive 40 Kmh until they get back on the highway where they can then drive 50 Kmh to the Pit Stop. Unfortunately for Kevin & Drew, they misunderstand the clue and believe that they must drive 40 Kmh the whole way, allowing for the other teams to pass them.

Meanwhile, other teams make a wrong turn, allowing for more lead changes. The passing seesaw between David & Mary, Charla & Mirna, and Teri & Ian was awesome. And Mary being absolutely infuriated by Charla & Mirna passing them was just great. Yes to David & Mary getting into it!

Rob & Amber, by whatever… whatever, finish first again with Oswald & Danny right behind. It was a close, close Race to the Mat with Kevin & Drew ultimately being Philiminated in one of the most difficult eliminations ever. Definitely one of the closest finishes by all teams ever I think since TAR3’s infamous “Heavegate,” “You must walk” Pit Stop.

Oh! And the Valley of the Moon and the Valley of the Dead looked beautiful. 

The Teams
Kevin & Drew had a tough, tough time these first two legs. They seemed to be the weakest, physically, but with the closeness of the teams this week, they might have survived. Still, the (original) Frats were great to see again, but the Race was just too much.

I can’t believed I cheered for Amber when she put Rob in his place when he tried to start trouble with Eric at the airport. And his speech afterwards was just unbelievably insane, almost Jonathan-level insane.

After this episode, I can see and remember why Eric may deserve to be TAR9’s All-Star representative. He and Jeremy were very competent and physically fit so they were able to dominate the entire Race. But Danielle still has no business on the Race, especially seeing the previews for next week.

Now for the rest, I love them all (or most of them).

Oswald & Danny are quietly doing an outstanding job so far. No mistakes, other than the delayed flight which was out of their hands anyway. Joe & Bill, meanwhile, have definitely toned themselves down, though I hope that doesn’t affect them in the Race. Uchenna & Joyce were okay.

Dustin & Kandice are still blah. I didn’t care for their altercation with Charla & Mirna, if only because they were just as wrong as Charla & Mirna was in wanting to get info without paying.

Meanwhile, Charla & Mirna have taken their dramatics to another level. And I can’t say I hate it. Its harmless drama and that’s all fine. Their intensity is appreciated, and again, that stool exchange is almost as classic as Teri & Ian’s “pants” exchange”

Teri & Ian are still my absolute favorites. I was so afraid for them the entire episode. But they pulled it out. I hope they don’t make anymore big mistakes.

And David & Mary. I can’t wait to see their ruthlessness and cunningness in the coming episodes. No more friends for Mary, she’s in it to win!

Anyway, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!


Eric: “Don’t break your ankles. Don’t roll down the hill… like Humpty.”
Danielle: “Humpty?”
Eric “Off the wall? … Humpty Dumbass.”

Joe: “Who says gay men can’t drive?”
Bill: “Good job.”
Joe: “It’s gay four-wheelin’.”

Mirna: “Ooo… it might be chilly in Chile.”

Bill: “ …grab a shower when we get there?”
Joe: “I hope so! … You need one!”

Charla: “I need a step stool.”
Mirna: “Charla, I don’t have time for a step stool, please”
Charla: “I CAN’T REACH IT!”
Mirna: “There is no step stool.”
Charla: “THIS is a step stool!”

Danny: “Look at these nails! My manicurist would be so angry with me if she knew what I was doing today.”

Danny: “I think I was a man in a previous life.”

Charla: “Beauty is sometimes skin deep. Its easy to make yourself beautiful with plastic surgery. But to have a pure heart and to have morals is not easy to make up.”
*cue BQ evil laugh*

*Admiring the Valley of the Moon*
Danny: “I’m dirty, I stink , I’m tired… but this? This is killer.”
Oswald, crying: “Oh my God, I feel like such a bitch.”

Mirna: “GO! GO! What’s your problem? You drive like a girl?”
Mirna: “Clueless! At least if you knew where you were going, you could do your little maneuvers.”
Charla: “That’s fine, I’ll hold it.”


Recap: The Amazing Race (11) All-Stars, Episode 1 – “I’m touching poop right now.”


And the All-Stars are off! The 11th season of The Amazing Race begins with some of the best, most memorable teams ever.

The Leg
We start off with teams in speed boats led by some group of acrobats I guess… maybe gymnasts… or cheerleaders… anyway, we get the 11 all-star teams introduced by Phil.

Then they all Race to the airport where we get David & Mary booking tickets on the slower flight and then being very sneaky with lying to the BQs and telling Teri & Ian to go to American Airlines. Hee… go David & Mary!

Once in Ecuador, the teams Race to the Plaza de San Francisco where we see Drew slip and fall. He stays on the ground for a little bit, but Kevin tells him to get up and back into the taxi. Drew thinks he’s dislocated his shoulder, but its fine later on.

The teams spend the night at Pim’s Restaurant and, in groups, depart 15 minutes apart the next morning.

They must make their way to the North Entrance of Cotopaxi National Park.

Lots of place changing all over the episode, and Charla & Mirna and John Vito & Jill get lost and are taken to the South Entrance which is considerably farther to the Detour than if they entered through the North Entrance.

For the Detour, teams had to choose between “Wrangle it” or “Recover It.” Rob & Amber first do Recover It where they must find three items to put on a military uniform, but quit that (heh… they love quitting tasks) and do Wangle It where they must cut the nails and mane of a horse.

All the teams do Wrangle It and then proceed to run up to the Pit Stop.

Kevin & Drew and John Vito & Jill were the last two teams and the original Frats blow out their tire and drive on just the rim all the way to the task.

And then John Vito & Jill became the first All-Star team to be Philiminated.

The Teams
Okay… John Vito & Jill. I absolutely loved them in TAR3. They are the original Kris & Jon (or are Kris & Jon, JVJ v2.0?) They were strong, good looking, nice, sweet… they were just awesome. So it is very sad to see them be the first out of All-Stars when a few of the other teams shouldn’t be on All-Stars in the first place. They were done in by bad navigation again… which sucks because they are definitely a capable team. They are still one of my favorite teams ever. I was shocked when I first found out they broke up, but I am so happy to see them say they grew closer being back on the Race.

Continuing the TAR3 love… I was cheering when I heard the first “HOORAH!” of the season. Teri & Ian are just awesome. Definitely one of my favorite teams ever. Still being the oldest team to ever make the Final 3 is a big accomplishment. And after 4 years, they’ve still got it.

Charla & Mirna are still their same ol’ selves. I would’ve wanted them to do a little better though. Come on Charla! (and Mirna)

The Guidos, Joe & Bill seem to have lost their evilness. This isn’t the same Joe & Bill that pushed Nancy out of the way in the airport. And while it would be great to see the scheming Guidos again, the first TAR villains, it will be interesting to see them as “gay grandpas” (as they put it).

Kevin & Drew… man, they looked like TAR5’s Marshall and Lance out there. I hope they don’t fall the same way they did. They are one of the teams that really need to step it up.

David & Mary are still good ol’ people. I love them being starstruck, I always love Racers who are actually TAR fans. I am definitely looking forward to seeing them Race without an alliance.

Oswald & Danny are still as funny as they were in TAR2, if not more so. They did very well this episode, I think they will go very far if they keep it up.

Uchenna & Joyce… eh, they’re just there. I don’t really know why they are there though. Great, great people, good winners, but there are better teams out there.

Dustin & Kandice… another blah team. I doubt they can be as dominant as they were in TAR10, especially racing against veterans.

Rob & Amber… ugh… so Rob says they had to drag their asses back for the Race? Well excuse me sir, there are whole lot of other teams who would easily pack up their bags and go . And Amber needs to get off her high horse. Her whole every team wants to Race against us line was just so high and mighty, even Linda Weaver (TAR8) would tell her to get over herself.  I did love that they only got a trip instead of the usual $20,000 for first in the first leg.

And Eric & Danielle, a team that shouldn’t even be on All-Stars. Why are they there again? Yeah Eric & Jeremy were pretty dominant, but to pair Eric with Danielle, who was part of one of the worst TAR teams ever? If TAR was going to ignore a season, TAR9 should’ve been more snub-worthy than TAR4, TAR6, or TAR8.

Overall, it was a good premiere. I wish it was longer though. The episode felt rushed and lacking a lot of stuff. There are a lot of clips at that could’ve very well made the episode.

Anyway, be sure to watch THE FINISH LINE every Monday at 1PM ET/10AM PT at and watch the new ELIMINATION STATION at where we all get to see what goes on in Sequesterville!


Teri: “So what did you think of the boat?”
Ian: “Oh the boat was cool. It was like ‘Miami Vice,’ felt like we were chasing drug dealers in the 80s again.”

Drew: “Did you see everyone pass me? I looked like an idiot.”
Kevin: “Yeah you do… you do.”

Oswald: “You’re doing great! You’re awesome!”
Danny: “Keep stroking me… I like it.”

Danny (to Rob & Amber): “I heard you guys have your own cable channel… with a bunch of shows on them.”

Teri: “That’s Mirna and Schmirna. Isn’t that nice how we all come with names. Do we have a name?”
Ian: “I hope we’re the big kahunas.”

Oswald: “My face is going through menopause.”

Mirna: “Mas rapido, rapido! This is too little bit rapido!”

Oswald: “We know of Rob and Amber because obviously, well, we live on this planet.”

John Vito: “I’ve had enough of Rob and Amber and I think America may have also.”

Joe: “It seems that maybe the people from Race 10 aren’t tired yet. No Gutsy Grannies here.”

Joe: “I told you they’re really tough competition. Everybody underestimates them because he’s crochety and old looking.”

Oswald: “We chose to do ‘Wrangle’ because I’ve always wanted a career in beauty. So if I can cut the nails of a horse, I can sure cut someone’s hair and give them a manicure.”

Teri: “You are the first team to arrive.”
Ian (laughing): “That would be a miracle of God.”
*looks up to the sky*
Ian: “Are you listening?”

*Some driver honks their horn*
Jill: “Oh give it up.”

Danielle: “I’m touching poop right now.”

Mary (about Charla): “Look at her! She’s beautiful!”

Charla: “Well, we’re not last… and we’ll beat [David & Mary] in a footrace.”
Mirna: “Yeah right.”

Mirna: “Wrangle is going to require holding down a wild horse.”
Charla: “That’s fine, I’ll hold it.”