Recap: The Amazing Race Australia vs New Zealand, Episode 5 – "Right now I don't care if he pees in his pants."


The 5th Leg begins immediately (TV time) as teams learn they will be flying to St. Petersburg, Russia.

Teams are given plane tickets, but are under no obligation to use them. Carla & Hereni find a better flight through Johannesburg and Zurich and tell John & Murray about it to repay them for the Express Pass and in the hopes they can work together.

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Ashleigh & Jarrod also find a different flight which will depart 2nd out of Namibia through Dubai. The last three teams will fly through London. All flights arrive 30 minutes apart.

The two Kiwi teams arrive in St. Petersburg and must now make their way to the Battleship Aurora where they will find their next clue. But Carla & Hereni pass the man waiting with clues outside and instead start searching through the boat.

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John & Murray, however, see the clue guy and open it up to reveal the Road Block.

For this Road Block, teams must decipher the meaning of a message being communicated using flag semaphore and translate it into Russian.

Murray decides to do the Road Block. He sees Carla & Hereni on the deck and they also start taking note of the man’s flag signals. They go down to get a chalkboard, but then realize John is holding a clue. Realizing that John will not be helping them at all, they continue searching on the boat for the clue they need.

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They are absolutely lost until they see where Ashleigh & Jarrod have come from with the clue. Jarrod and Hereni decide to do the Road Block.

After a couple of attempts, Murray gets the thumbs up and he and John can now head to the Nevsky Prospekt museum to find their next clue. Murray makes a point to wipe his chalkboard clean.

Jarrod is close behind when he realizes he needs to wait for the start signal to get the whole message.

Daniel & Ryan arrive at the battleship and also run straight on. They meet Carla & Hereni and they agree to help each other. Carla tells them where the clue man is. Ryan does the Road Block and he and Hereni will work together to decipher the clue.

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Ashleigh & Jarrod cannot find a taxi, so they head back to the battleship and hope to try and take one of the arriving teams’ taxi. They spot Sally & Tyson who are asking their driver to wait for them. Ashleigh & Jarrod propose a deal. Jarrod will give them critical information on the Road Block and he and Ashleigh will take the taxi to the next Route Marker before sending it back.

Though Sally is apprehensive, Tyson says it sounds okay. So Jarrod tells them to wait for the start signal and he and Ashleigh hop in and speed off.

Sally decides to do the Road Block and finds Jarrod’s advice helps not one bit. Cat & Jesse arrive and Cat decides to do it.

Meanwhile, Ryan gets the correct message on his first try and he gives Hereni the answer as promised earlier. Hereni wipes her board clean, much to the shock of Cat & Jesse who expected they would still follow through with the unspoken New Zealand alliance.

Sally gets the message on her first try. She sets her board down and Cat asks if she would like to show it to her. Sally looks to Tyson who tells her to just go. Cat thanks them for the huge help.

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All teams are on their way to the museum where they will find the Detour. For both sides of the Detour, teams must make their way to Beloselsky-Belozersky Palace.
In Cossack, teams will dress up and learn and perform a traditional Cossack dance, the national dance of Russia.
In Coat Rack, teams must identify which number coat tag is missing from a chain of hundreds before searching for the missing tag in the coatroom.

John & Murray choose Cossack, but have trouble learning and performing the dance. Ashleigh & Jarrod manage to catch up, not having sent the taxi back to Sally & Tyson, and also choose the dancing.


Sally & Tyson, Daniel & Ryan and Cat & Jesse choose Coat Rack while Carla & Hereni go dancing.

After a dozen tries, John & Murray switch over to the Coat Rack Detour, but there are only three tables for teams to lay out their coat tags and the three teams already doing the Detour will definitely not share with John & Muzza.

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With no one willing to help them and with no idea how to do this task, John & Murray decide they’re going back to the dancing.

Daniel & Ryan find the missing coat tag first and open the next clue pointing them to the Imperial Hall at the Taleon Imperial Hotel. Also, INTERSECTION AHEAD!

On the way, Daniel & Ryan decide they would never pair up with John & Murray. Speaking of, the best mates finish the Detour and head to the hotel.

But Daniel & Ryan’s taxi driver gets them lost, allowing Ashleigh & Jarrod to get to the hotel next to team up with John & Murray despite the teams having talked about never teaming up with them.

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For this Intersection, teams must make their way through a vault armed with a sensitive laser detection field to retrieve a jeweled egg. What’s inside the egg will guide them to the next Pit Stop.

Sally & Tyson finish the Detour with Cat & Jesse close behind. Carla & Hereni have fallen to last.

At the Intersection, John orders Ashleigh around the maze though Ashleigh basically leads the way. They grab the eggs, the laser field is deactivated and they open them up to reveal a little figurine of the Pit Stop: the Church of the Saviour on Spilled Blood.

Ashleigh & Jarrod hop in a taxi, but get antsy, so they hop out and go on foot.


Sally & Tyson happily pair-up with Daniel & Ryan. Sally and Daniel decide to do the task together. They navigate through and get the eggs. Daniel & Ryan know where the location is so they run it.

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Cat & Jesse wait for the next team to team up with and are not too happy that it is the traitorous Carla & Hereni. Cat and Carla decide to do the task, but Cat trips the laser and a man forcibly escorts them out. They have to try again and this time Carla guides Cat every step of the way. Cat & Jesse decide all is forgiven.

Meanwhile, the footrace to the Mat results in John & Murray arriving first. Grant welcomes them, but WAIT! They are still Racing.

Episode Thoughts

Not as exciting as the Namibia Leg, but still some good competition. The Road Block was okay, though it was one of those “Give the other teams the answer” task. At least though, Carla & Hereni had given Daniel & Ryan information in return. So Hereni just copying the answer (or did Ryan write it himself!?) was less sketchy.

Sally & Tyson giving up their taxi and then handing Cat & Jesse the answer though. Eeek!

The Detour was a fine balance. Both sides of the Detour were pretty time consuming. And every Race has to have a dancing task.

TARUS may have banned Intersections from all future Races, but TARAu definitely used it in the right place here as part of a non-elimination/TBC Leg. Sometimes I think stuff like U-Turns and Yield and Intersections should only be used on non-elimination Legs so it doesn’t eliminate a team. Instead, it provides the drama that the U-Turns, et al are supposed to provide with no bearing on an elimination which sometimes may or may not be fair. Or at least, sometimes a little cruel.

But these two Legs have been fascinating to watch the teams’ relationships with each other. Using each other, passing judgment on each other, throwing each other to the side; it’s amazing actually. All competitive-minded teams. Imagine that. (Hello TARUS!)

One interesting point though, Daniel & Ryan were only 4 minutes behind Sally & Tyson!

My Subjective Team Rankings

Daniel & Ryan are definitely having some navigational troubles. I hope they can get that fixed because it would suck for a promising team like them to get done in by poor directions. Still, they also made the same mistake as Carla & Hereni who were back to their non-alpha moms personality. Very disappointing to see them struggle this entire Leg. Ouch.

Sally & Tyson are still a fun, likeable team. But them giving up their taxis to Ashleigh & Jarrod!? Then giving Cat & Jesse the answer when they were the last two teams there!? That is not the way to do it. Hopefully they don’t make it a habit that eventually gets them eliminated.

Cat & Jesse were kinda annoying with the help situation at the Road Block. They made it seem more than just their usual “Thanks a lot” quips, instead actually taking issue with Carla & Hereni not giving them the answer. Ashleigh & Jarrod meanwhile were also hilariously hypocritical. After brushing Jono aside in the last Leg when he asked for help, Jarrod begs (a gullible) Tyson for help in this Leg. Still, Ashleigh is much more awesome though.

John & Murray are meh. And them getting first again is nowhere near as enjoyable as Natalie & Meaghan’s domination.

Episode Quotes

Sally: “Right now I don’t care if he’s pees in his pants.”

Ashleigh: “Am I right? Watch my ass.”

Ashleigh: ” He definitely didn’t carry me. And if he thinks he did, he’s got rocks in his head.”

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