The Gang is all dressed up and getting drunk as they get ready to head into their high school reunion. Dennis wants to relive his days as the “golden god” of St. Joe’s while Dee is excited to show everyone her back and that she doesn’t have a brace any more.
“Baby got back! Ho! Ho!!”
They “smash ’em up” and walk to the school. Charlie has two pairs of underwear just in case he gets an atomic wedgie. And if he does, he’ll just go to the bathroom and get high. Mac says he doesn’t have to do any of that stuff or eat things to get people to like him. But Dee says, well, actually, he does. If Charlie weren’t the class clown and Mac wasn’t a drug dealer, no one would know who they were.
The guard doesn’t let Frank in since he wasn’t a student. So they smash ’em up again before leaving Frank outside. Charlie is looking forward to hanging out with The Waitress, but he and Dee suddenly hide behind Mac and Dennis when they see Brad Fisher at the check-in table.
They sneak into the gym and let Dennis and Mac pick-up their nametags for them. They point out his acne has come back, but Brad tells them they’re actually scars from the hornets. He asks if Charlie is around, but they pretend not to know him.
They look for their nametags and Dennis has his, Charlie and Dee’s, but Mac doesn’t want to put on his own. Dennis insists he does, despite Mac insisting he shouldn’t since no one calls him this name anymore. And finally, Mac’s full name is revealed… Ronald McDonald.
Inside the gym, Dee is trying to get the attention of one Adriano Calvanese, the coolest, most popular guy in their class, but also the guy who coined Dee’s “aluminum monster” nickname as well as Charlie’s “dirtgrub” nickname. He also made him eat spiders. Dee tells Charlie about her plan to get revenge on him for them both. She’ll infiltrate their inner circle of jerks and then strike when the time is right.
Adriano walks over and recognizes the aluminum monster, but also complements her and how great she looks today. Dee melts. Adriano hands Charlie a marker to sniff, but Mac comes over to tell him he doesn’t have to do it. Adriano recognizes him too and Dee gleefully reminds him of Mac’s nickname, “Ronnie the Rat” because he was a narc and a tattle tale who became the main drug dealer when he ratted out the other drug dealer.
Adriano then remembers he gave ringworm to everyone back in high school. They explain Mac gave it to Charlie while they were wrestling and then probably gave it to the rest of the wrestling team when they tried out.
“They probably still have it cuz they’re so gay together. See you later Dirtgrub and Ronnie the Rat. Hope you suck each other’s rotten peckers until you get mouth cancer.”
Adriano seems to take a liking to Dee and invites her back to their table. Dennis comes over to Mac and Charlie and informs them he won’t be talking to them all night because they’ll lower his stock. He goes to set up shop at an empty table to allow his “subjects” to come kiss his ring, but instead, here comes Frank who took the nametag of some girl named Nikki Potnick. Then comes Maureen Ponderosa who shows off her diamond dead (and still smelly) tooth, which she’s paid for with Dennis’ alimony payments.
Dennis can’t believe he’s surrounded by ex-wives and ” old men who are pretending to be women.” But even worse, here comes The Waitress stumbling to the table. She says she’s fallen off the wagon again and she didn’t even have a nametag, like she didn’t exist or something.
He gets up and leaves and so do Frank and Maureen.
At the cool table, a drunk Dee is laughing it up and they’re all having fun. Here comes Rickety Cricket, dressed as a priest and saying they’ve welcomed him back to the church. He goes around the table to hug everyone and bless them. The Waitress comes over completely plastered and calls Dee a bitch.
Across the gym, Dennis is still alone until Frank joins him. A guy recognizes Dennis from across the room and its Tim Murphy, the guy who slept with Dennis’ prom date. He walks over with his wife and Dennis continues on with his “golden god” shtick to which Tim says is the same ol’ Dennis Reynolds.
Charlie and Mac are trying to get a couple of beers but they only have four tickets between them. Here comes Adriano with a buttload of tickets from the computer lab. Mac decides to narc on him and calls him out on the fake tickets. The bartenders deny them the beers. Not cool, Adriano says.
Charlie can’t believe Mac got them on the cool kids’ bad side. Now all he can do is head to the bathroom to go huff on something. Frank suggests to Mac that they go to Plan B, he’s got Dee’s old back brace in the car. They go to Charlie in the bathroom who’s mixing up ammonia and bleach which knocks him out immediately.
Into the bathroom come Adriano, Dee, Brad and the rest of the cool kids who want some revenge for cutting off their alcohol supply. Adriano gives Mac a wedgie, Dee to Frank while Brad attempts to give one to Charlie and his old, hole-filled undies.
“I’m a grown goddamn man!!!”
Cricket is talking with Tim about staying away from “those people” when Adriano and posse come back to the table. Dennis comes by but they brush him off as well.
Suddenly, everyone realizes their jewelry and wallets are missing. Tim notices a necklace hanging out of Cricket’s neck and Adriano rips Cricket’s shirt open to show a bunch of necklaces hanging around his neck… and a body covered in ringworm.
Cricket panics and blurts out how he and Dee were supposed to be together. Adriano points at Dennis and Dee and says they probably have ringworm together. And to think he was going to let Dee jack him off too.
The cool kids all leave Dennis and Dee alone as they kick Cricket out.
TO BE CONTINUED
It is always fun to see familiar faces back on the show. And this episode reminded how most of the recurring or memorable characters the Gang has encountered were their high school classmates. It’s almost like they were building up to this moment.
Can’t wait for next week’s conclusion, but this week’s episode felt like one big setup for something I hope doesn’t disappoint.
Everyone’s been wondering about the Waitress’ real name, yet we never really cared about what Mac’s real name could be. Ronald McDonald? Randomly hilarious. And is Frank’s new persona, Nikki Potnick, really the Waitress? Very interesting!
Kinda sad we didn’t see more between Brad and Dee though. Maureen’s stank dead tooth and Frank’s reactions were hilarious. Tough break for Sasha Roiz having his Sunny guest spot airing against a special Grimm. Or maybe, good since he’s working a lot these days.
Anyway, one episode left in the season. Here’s hoping part 2 of the reunion delivers big time!