Recap: It’s Always Sunny in Philadephia, Episode 9.06 – The Gang Saves the Day
Frank brings the Gang to a convenience store he says has the best hot dogs in Philly. Dee decides they might as well buy some snacks while Charlie suggests they buy some beer.
Suddenly, a masked robber storms in and points his gun at the store clerk as the Gang hides.
“What should we do?” they ask.
Mac starts to think about what he’d do. He gets up and confronts the robber (in a Steven Seagal voice).
“You better say cheese.”
Mac flings hot nacho cheese at his eyes, knocks his head on the counter and grabs the guy’s gun to disassemble it in a flash. The Gang comes out of hiding.
That was amazing! Except his cheese line. But amazing nonetheless.
Mac goes to unmask the robber and *gasp* Yakuza!
The Gang goes back to hide as other masked Yakuza members come in. Mac fights them all.
The Gang is cornered at the back, but they push Dee right into the path of a Yakuza’s nunchuks and she gets knocked out cold. Mac shrugs and continues to fly around the store fighting them off.
He finishes off the goons when a well-dressed man comes walking out applauding his efforts. Mac decides to deliver a flying kick that sends the man backwards into the fridge glass.
Why would you do that? the store clerk asks as he runs over to check on his father! Oops. The guys ask what’s wrong with Mac’s voice when suddenly, one of the Yakuza hurls a shuriken at his neck.
The guys apologize for doubting his awesomeness and before he dies, Mac says he doesn’t forgive them.
His spirit walks out of his body as the guys cry and wail. He starts flying up to heaven where he is led by two shirtless, buff angels to an equally buff, shirtless God who congratulates him and invites him to sit at his right hand.
Mac wakes up from his dream and now it’s Dee’s turn.
The guys blame her for the situation they’re in and they decide to sacrifice her.
“Have your way with the whore!”
The robber takes his mask off and… it’s actually a woman. She offers to blow the “assholes” away, but Dee tries to calm her down and asks for the gun. They guys cheer for her as a hero.
“I’ll see you in hell boners!”
Dee shoots them all dead… including the store clerk. The robber likes Dee’s style and proposes they work together.
But when the cops come, Dee points the finger at her.
The detective says they need to put Dee in witness protection and asks if she can do characters.
Can Dee do characters!? She just smiles.
Cut to Dee arriving at a rich family’s house as their new butler, Albert Covington. It’s a swell old time, but it turns out, it was just a sitcom and thanks to her convincing portrayal, she was spun off into her own show which became the highest rated sitcom of all time.
She is being interviewed about her upcoming movie “Mother Earth” about a beautiful warrior princess who saves the world. It’s already grossed $900 million in presale tickets, but all she cares about is “exploring truth through character.”
The interviewer also brings up that Dee’s just gotten engaged to Josh Groban, who’s sitting there next to her.
“Groban does like his ladies to pop.”
Dee asks him to sing the song he wrote for her, the one about her being beautiful not like a bird.
But turns out their marriage only lasted 17 minutes when she met a new man… Brad Pitt.
Back to reality. And it’s Dennis’ turn.
Dennis confronts the robber, but he gets shot in the head. He falls to the floor and starts recalling some of his greatest moments including his proclamation that he is God.
He wakes up in the hospital.
“Does my dick work?”
“No, your penis does not work.”
Dennis would rather be dead. But the doctor introduces him to the nurse that’ll help with his rehab, big breasted former weather reporter Jackie Denardo. After a montage of the rehab, Dennis is even better than his old self.
While roller blading, he lets go of her right into traffic. She’s lucky to be alive. But her breasts are gone. The doctor says she has a long and difficult life ahead of her and it’s good that he’s there for her like she was for him.
Instead, he smothers her with a pillow and she dies.
Back in the shop. It’s Frank’s turn. He tells everyone to stay calm and he’ll handle this. He sneaks around to the hot dogs takes some and eats while the cops arrive and there’s a shootout including a dog that attacks and kills Dee.
Frank continues stuffing his face with hot dogs.
It’s now Charlie’s turn. And it’s an animated one. The Waitress walks into the store and Charlie pushes Dee into the line of fire, killing her and saving the Waitress who he runs out with.
They kiss and The Waitress moves in with him. She is disgusted by all the rats, but he claps his hands and the rats engulf her… creating a wedding dress for her. They get married at the Marriage Store. They plant a tree and the rats build them a house in the country.
He still works as a janitor and she works as a waitress.
After burying another one of his rat friends, The Waitress decide they should go buy some babies at the Baby Store. They bring them home and Charlie teaches them how to play Nyte Kroller.
They grow old together and send their children off to work every day at The Waitress Company and Kelly and Sons’ Janitorial Service.
But The Waitress becomes very sick. And she passes away. They bury her in front of their home next to the rats.
Time passes, Charlie becomes Carl from Up and flies away in his home.
The Gang snaps him back to reality.
They are all thinking of the same thing. Grab as much shit as they can and run out of the store.
Happy 100th Episode!
Just like how amazing it is to realize It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is in its 9th season, so too is it amazing that it has lasted 100 episodes. And how insanely hilarious have those 100 episodes been?
This episode was fun and classic Sunny, giving us perfect little capsules of each of the Gang’s respective personalities. Gay, religious, Seagal-wannabe Mac. Not-bird, talented star Dee. Dennis, the perfect specimen of a man. Simple Frank. And Charlie, the hopeless romantic king of the rats.
The episode was a fun fantasy that paid a nice little mini tribute to the Gang and the show we’ve watched for nine years. Each little dream was fun and hilarious, especially to fans who’ve been with the show for a long time.
Definitely a great episode.