Charlie is trying to hold cable wires together that he’s tapping over from the neighboring building so Mac and Frank can watch Real Housewives. He kinda wants to stop now because he’s getting electrocuted and is tried from all the asbestos he’s inhaled.
Dennis meanwhile wants them to stop watching the crap and go out dancing with him. Dee comes in all disheveled because she hasn’t showered in a few days from playing an online game. She offers five dollars to Charlie to come play her avatar while she goes and takes care of her crops.
After one last shock, Charlie drops the wires and says he’s going with Dee because he’s sick of being treated like an incapable grunt all the time. Who knows…
“I might even rule the world one day.”
They leave and Dennis laughs, “If that happens I’ll blow myself.”
Dee gives Charlie the rundown on the game she’s been playing, Techpocalypse. Her avatar’s name is ZingingCutie23 and all Charlie has to do is watch over her tribe of avatars based on the Gang; Mac as a handmaiden, Dennis as a midget blacksmith, Frank as a half-donkey, and Charlie as the jester eating out of a trough.
Meanwhile, Dennis takes Mac and Frank to Oscar’s where they are the only ones dancing. Frank feels “weird as shit,” so Dennis suggests they take some shots to loosen them up. A guy at the bar recognizes them from the game and both Frank and Mac are upset Dee is virtually humiliating them. Dennis says they should focus on real life and takes all the shots before throwing it all up onto the bar.
Dee returns home with a new smartphone so she can play the game anywhere anytime. But she finds Charlie has changed her name to ZingingCutie44 and has completely upgraded her profile by actually playing the game correctly.
He tells Dee she’s merely been spending money in the game on pointless things like she does in real life. If it were him, he’d take the $5 and get himself milk, flour and vitamins and boil them into energy balls which would sustain him for a month.
Dee is surprised to find she’s got 31 new followers and asks Charlie to team up with her. If she’s doing good in the game, she’s doing good in life. He doesn’t want to be her slave so he suggests to be the King. But then they’d have to be married. So Dee sends him a request to consummate… or have sex, in simple Charlie terms.
“So, uh, we should have sex then.”
“In the game.”
“Yeah, in the game, sure… either way.”
“So push ‘Enter’ hard? Or like, slow push and you do your thing? Or a little circular action…”
Meanwhile, Mac and Frank are also playing. But Mac, who has himself as a big giant, has picked fights with everyone he comes across and loses every time. He’s become known as the Soiled Fool. Frank is doing very well for himself though as a “gorgeous girl with big cans.” He’s been banging all the fisherman for food and getting catty with all the women like a Real Housewife.
A very hungover Dennis comes out to criticize them for their virtual lives, but Mac tries to get him to understand. He pops in one of Dennis’ sex tapes. He has a girl on his bed and preparing to style her hair. He dances around her then pushes her down to…
“So much preamble.”
Mac asks how this makes Dennis feel, sexually. He’s very aroused. So are Mac and Frank. Mac explains that’s how sports and video games are. It’s a virtual experience. Dennis says no, he was actually there, he “drew her in, styled her hair and entered hair” without any resistance.
Frank says what if they’re in a “turtle’s dream in outer space” for all they know.
Dennis wants to prove them wrong, so he heads out to find more people to draw into him.
Charlie is gaming it up and Dee stumbles upon Frank (SweetPeaches69) in the game. He’s been getting a lot of REAL gifts like real peaches.
I’ve been eating like an islander, he says and has been leading a pretty classy life. He even has a REAL party planned with some of his new online friends, a very classy affair. He says Dee can come.
Dee goes in to tell Charlie about going to Frank’s party, but he already knows all about it from the game. Dee wants to live like Frank. But to do that, Charlie says, she must allow him to PLAY THE GAME. Stop bothering me, “be pretty. Talk to me right” and bring him his energy balls, he says.
Mac arrives and Charlie know all about Soiled Fool. Mac wants them to work together, so Charlie asks for a favor. He watches Dee while he goes to meet a girl he’s met online.
She’s probably fat, but Mac is interested if she has any fat, ugly or sick friends. Charlie says sure, fat, ugly, sick, male, female, whatever he likes.
Dennis is at the mall looking for people to experience him. He comes across a sensory deprivation chamber and decides to try it. He meets British Dennis who tells him he can create his own reality, his own universe. Because he is a god.
British Dennis then pushes real Dennis down to blow him.
Charlie is at the bar and meets Julie, Queen of Thrones from the game. She’s the 2nd most powerful only to him, RatSlayer. She brought him the best cheese steak in Philly. Aww, how sweet. He also has something for her. He hands her a box of… SPIDERS.
Ha! While she’s there with him, his followers have burned her land, raped her people and destroyed her tribe. You thought you could make a move on me, he says. She just wanted to have lunch.
He calls her a stupid fat pig, but she says she’s not fat. Which Charlie is surprised about, he thought she’d be fat like Mac said.
She calls him a dick, says his breath smells like dog food and throws her Hawaiian Punch Big Gulp on him.
Charlie yells after her, he’s doing good in the game, so he’s doing good in life.
Doing good in game so doing good in life.
Dee arrives at Frank’s party wearing some fur coat. No one else is dressed up. Frank throws a 101 Dalmatians joke at her since she looks like Cruella. Charlie arrives and asks for Dee’s phone and headseat because big things have happened in the game.
No, she says. She’s not with him anymore and wants a divorce. Knowing he was going to leave her for Queen of Thrones, she decided to sleep with Mac’s Soiled Fool to humiliate him.
But Charlie says how stupid, he was only tricking her so they could become the most powerful tribe in the game. I didn’t think, Dee says.
You didn’t think because you don’t think, you’re just a stupid kept housewife! Charlie snaps back at Dee.
“Zing it girl!”
Charlie tells Frank to shut the hell up and kicks everyone out except for the three.
He says they can all agree that this game is the most important thing that’s ever happened to them. Since he’s a cool guy, he’ll let them slide if Mac and Frank give him their shares of Paddy’s and if Dee will do all the Charlie work forever.
Dennis arrives and tries to do a British accent. He tells Charlie that he doesn’t have all the power anymore because the only thing bigger than a king is a god and that’s him. He decides his own reality and he’s decided all their realities, so he’s unplugged it.
He’s unplugged their virtual reality by deleting all their characters from the game. He was able to delete their characters since they all have the same password: Paddy’s Pub.
They ask why and Dennis says it was because the game was becoming irritating and was stupid. Now it’s the end of the game. That’s life, that’s how shit goes. Sometimes, things just sort of end.
Like this episode.
Episode Thoughts
Space turtles!
This was a fun episode, definitely more enjoyable than last week. It’s always great to see Charlie actually using what brain he’s got up there and actually be good at something the others aren’t. Also, only Charlie would push away girls who might actually be interested in him.
Dee trying to live a virtual life to get away from her messed up real life is definitely not new as we all know her previous online experience. Mac’s diverse sexual tastes in McPoyles, fat, sick, ugly people and maybe men is definitely an interesting thread this season. Maybe it’ll all come to a head (no pun intended) in the finale.
Dennis’s psychotic, creepy escapdes continue. And as soon as he said he’d blow himself when Charlie ruled the world in the beginning, I knew that would actually end up happening, somehow. I had no idea it would happen via a British Dennis. lol
And the abrupt ending. That’s pretty classic right there.
Overall, hilarious fun episode.
A detailed recap is nice and all, but you know what’s even better? Actually watching the full episode of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia!
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