Dennis and Dee are hiding in a closet, figuring out a way to escape. Dee suggests they just bum rush this woman (who is packing a suitcase) and choke her, but Dennis says that’s just escalating shit. They’ve just broken into someone’s home and the homeowner is actually home. Now they need to come up with a plan.
“Oh my God. Dee, you breath is hideous.”
Dennis regrets having given a grand, persuasive speech at the burger joint convincing the Gang that he’s has “the grace” to lead them on this mission. The woman leaves the bedroom and they call Charlie and Mac on the walkie. Mac asks if they have recovered the artifact, but Dennis and Dee say they need to bail on the plan.
“I have the grace of a falcon and I’ll be in and out like a demon’s whisper.”
Dee has to pee and they leave the closet. They tell Frank that they’re going and he pops out from under the bed. Charlie and Mac, feeling Indiana Jonesey, insist that the artifact must not be in this family’s possession after they have stolen it. They feel very strongly about the artifact after being angered by a newspaper article Dee had read to them earlier… about an art auction to help raise money for the museum.
Dennis and Dee quit, but Frank is still in. He likes living on the edge. Charlie and Mac warn them about an SUV and a cowboy booted man arriving at the house.
Dennis, Dee, and Frank (the extraction team) hide in the closet as the wife and husband talk. The husband says the alarm company had called and he came to check it out, but the wife says she must have tripped the alarm coming home to grab a jacket. Dennis, Dee and Frank become suspicious about the wife lying.
They relay to Charlie and Mac (fighting over chips) that the family is southern (based on their accents) and the wife just lied to the husband. They get out of the closet and Frank goes directly to the suitcase the wife had hidden under the bed, looking for a vase.
The Gang becomes worried though about these Southerners, these “carpetbaggers” who have shotguns, will hogtie them and burn them on a cross on their front lawn. Charlie suggests that everytime you find a torture basement in a home, you know they are from the South.
Dennis can’t take more of Charlie and Mac fighting over chips, so he switches off the walkie talkie. Dee looks at the bed and finds a whole bunch of tickets to Jay Leno. Frank suggests the wife is banging Leno. But Dee suggests she is still upset over the Leno-Conan thing and she is going to go kill Jay.
This is all absurd, Dennis says, but Frank is intent on getting the vase. He has a whip.
“Dee, you gangly, uncoordinated bitch. I am not getting hogtied over your lack of grace. ”
“I hope they hogtie you. And then I hope they rape you in their basement for ten years.”
Frank goes around the house on his own as Dee and Dennis try to escape, but before they head down the stairs, the wife starts coming back up. They run back up and go into the bathroom. They can hear the wife talking to someone on the phone about the husband knowing something is up. That they should just “pull the trigger.”
Dennis thinks they should try and figure out what is going on with this crazy Southern family, but Dee just really wants to pee right now.
“You’re going to intentionally spray DNA everywhere!?”
Dennis says her peeing will make too much noise, but she has to go.
“You are all liabilities.”
Dennis leaves and heads back into the bedroom closet. He switches the walkie on again and overhears Charlie and Mac planning to just leave the three of them there for dead and head to Arizona to open a leather shop that sells tasseled and turqouised leathers. Dennis tells them he just overheard all of that and orders them not to leave them there. He also says opening a leather shop in Arizona is crazy… there’s far too many leather shops in Arizona already and they’d close in a week’s time.
“You got us all freaked out here, sitting here waiting for the Southerners to tie us up to horses and have them run in opposite directions, ripping us apart!”
Charlie wants chips and Mac explodes over Charlie not wanting chips back at the hamburger shop. Dennis tells them to create a diversion. Dee flushes the toilet. Charlie then realizes, what if the vase is cursed.
Dee comes back into the closet. She tells Dennis she was worried about the sprayed DNA from her pee so she flushed. Dennis updates Dee on Mac and Charlie escalating the conversation into curses and Arizona leather shops. Dee agrees they’d be out of business in a week’s time too.
Dee suggests to break them up so they can concentrate and provokes Charlie to think about why Mac is the only one who gets to push the button on the walkie.
Meanwhile, Frank has entered a little girl’s room. He sees a suitcase in the room and opens it hoping to find the vase. Dennis and Dee tell him not to open it, but he does and finds a bear with something hard in it. The mother probably put the vase in the bear to steal it from the husband. He rips the bear open to find… the voice box, which is now voicing very loudly. He tries to smother it then starts slamming it against the bed post, Dennis and Dee can’t believe it.
They wonder how they have not been caught yet and then suddenly Charlie pops into the closet. He says he had a hard time searching every single one of the closets in the house and that he had just walked in through the front door after Mac was being a dick about the walkie.
Suddenly, the family’s daughter arrives and they ask Mac why he didn’t warn them. But he’s actually left to go buy burgers. Mac suggests he pretends to be a Swedish plumber so the extraction team can escape through the back. OMG, they think. They’re on their own. They realize that this family has no awareness of their surroundings so they should just walk right out the front door.
They walk out and hear the mother telling the daughter they are going to Disneyland, right now. They call to warn Frank.
“I’m going to whip this girl in the face if she makes a peep.”
The daughter goes to her room to find the stuffed animal she wants to bring and she goes into her closet full of toys to get it, not seeing Frank blending in with the rest of the toys.
Dee, Dennis and Charlie get downstairs and realize, this isn’t an evil Southern family, it’s just a nice mother planning a surprise vacation for her daughter. But suddenly, a man arrives at the door. A Barry. The daughter wonders why he’s here and the mother says he will be going with them to Disneyland, not the father.
Dee, Dennis and Charlie hide in the hall closet as they hear Barry say he’ll be the new daddy. The real father arrives and confronts his wife and Barry as the daughter cries. Dee, Dennis and Charlie cringe at the sad, messy situation in the living room. The father threatens to beat Barry up.
But the father says they should sit down as a family and talk it out. All night if they have to.
Ugh… no, Dennis, Dee and Charlie can’t wait this out all night, so they decide to just walk out. They walk towards the front door and glance into the living room to see… the family… who is actually Asian.
The doorbell rings and Mac walks in with a plunger and Swedish accent. The family stares at them, bewildered. Charlie calls for Frank and he comes down. He sees the vase on a table in the living room and whips at it, breaking it to pieces. Oops. They walk out of the house.
“It was weird that they were Asian right?”
Wow, this could be one of my favorite Sunny episodes in a long time. I haven’t laughed out loud this much at a Sunny episode since I don’t know when. It was absurdly hilarious, more so than all the randomly hilarious episodes we’ve had, even the two that just aired.
Again, the episode went by very fast, but the idea that characters standing in closets for half an episode hasn’t been this funny since Lucy pretended she was a chair and thought her new neighbors were Russian spies/assassins.
Even funnier how this wasn’t even the craziest the show has been. It was actually all very logical and not surprising that the Gang would get into this kind of mess.
Escalation, liabilities, leather shops, chips, and Asian Southerners… I think this will be one of Sunny‘s classics. This definitely makes up for the slow start to the season.